Ponderous, meandering epic with a few bright spots. This film is about a soldiers quest to find a renegade and insane Colonel (a bald Brando in an extended cameo) who has hidden himself away in the depths of the jungle and is causing all manner of commotion. Quite what it was - I can't remember, but it was important enough to go down stream in search of him. Sheen's character decides to head down river with his fellow soldiers and seek out the bald lunatic before its too late. Robert Duvall is hilarious as a war immune soldier - especially when a shell explodes near him and he merely gives it a disinterested glance. Amusing! On the whole, though, this is a ponderous trip - the film seems to meander aimlessly with little to keep this viewer interested.

• Ian Beale