Staggeringly awful. Fails to be scary. Fails to be amusing. Terrible acting. This comes across as a fan film made by a struggling theatre troupe manned by amateurs. This excitable bunch of talent free people decide it would be fun to galavant around Paris wearing a phoney throat also. They are keen, I'll give them that but it's just that they are in a stinker of fan video proportions. The joy they take in appearing out of thin air with their torn throats reminded me of an episode of Randall and Hopkirk Deceased. Light and frothy - with no menace or air of unease present. Now you see him - now you don't! This is pantomime stuff. A disgrace to John Landis' classic this thing is. The whole production is cable movie quality. SYFY channel stuff, right here. If Landis were dead, he would be spinning in his grave.

• Charles Dance